Lately, I realize that I’ve been asphyxiated by life — or more specifically, the hallucinogenic ideologies of success imposed by the pressures of everyday society.
What is success, anyway?
Sometimes I wonder what my real priorities are. I want to follow my passions, but I need to be financially secure. I find it’s hard to focus on my passions knowing that I live paycheck to paycheck. When I take my lunch, I often pass by others on their lunch. Just by looking at them, I get the feeling that they don’t often have these types of worries. Their clothes, their car, their sleek iPhone 4 — all of these things tell me that they’re doing alright. At the same time, however, I wonder. Are these individuals happy? Did they follow their passions and dreams? Or perhaps they’re simply content with being successful.
I want to be successful. That’s right, I’m not going to lie. I’d love to have the status and material wealth that’s synonymous with being successful. Unfortunately, I’m host to an internal struggle that will not cease. I will not settle for a meaningless job, regardless of the pay. I will follow, explore, and develop my passions. I will make a difference. All this time, I thought I was in need of a way out; an easy exit.
What I really needed, however, was to breathe.